Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Have you got a helpful suggestion for our show or for these forums?
Durnett
New Member
Posts: 15
Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2009 6:31 pm

Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Durnett » Mon Oct 04, 2010 3:47 pm

How about unicorns?
-Where did the legend originate?
-Do the occasional discoveries of goats or deer with only one horn or antler shed any light on this creature? How did the horn get stuck on a horse?
-Why can they only be approached by virgins?
-Are there still believers today? (Other than the Church of the Invisible Pink Unicorn)
-Does this unicorn t-shirt threaten my credibility?

Durnett
New Member
Posts: 15
Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2009 6:31 pm

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Durnett » Mon Oct 04, 2010 4:11 pm

Just had a follow-up thought:
If unicorns don't provide enough meat for a full podcast, you could expand it to include all of the equine monsters: pegasus, centaurs, ghost horses, etc.

....mmmmmm...unicorn meat.....

Aztexan
King of the Limericks
King of the Limericks
Posts: 7539
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2007 10:39 pm

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Aztexan » Mon Oct 04, 2010 4:14 pm

It's because of the sexual prowess you get from a ground unicorn horn is why they're extinct and we're here to speculate about them.
This is a sentence. tHi5 iz a seN+3nce oN drUgs!!!

"When injustice becomes law, resistance becomes duty"--sign seen at Occupy Wall St. protest.

User avatar
OlegTheBatty
Has More Than 9K Posts
Posts: 9779
Joined: Thu Mar 27, 2008 2:35 pm
Custom Title: Uppity Atheist

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby OlegTheBatty » Mon Oct 04, 2010 4:17 pm

ruben lopez wrote:It's because of the sexual prowess you get from a ground unicorn horn is why they're extinct and we're here to speculate about them.

So, who's spreading the propaganda that declining fertility rates are due to education and access to birth control?
. . . with the satisfied air of a man who thinks he has an idea of his own because he has commented on the idea of another . . . - Alexandre Dumas 'The Count of Monte Cristo"

There is no statement so absurd that it has not been uttered by some philosopher. - Cicero

Chachacha
Has More Than 9K Posts
Posts: 9044
Joined: Sun May 28, 2006 1:07 am
Custom Title: Irrational Skeptic

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Chachacha » Mon Oct 04, 2010 4:31 pm

Rainbows don't poop.

Aztexan
King of the Limericks
King of the Limericks
Posts: 7539
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2007 10:39 pm

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Aztexan » Mon Oct 04, 2010 4:58 pm

OlegTheBatty wrote:
ruben lopez wrote:It's because of the sexual prowess you get from a ground unicorn horn is why they're extinct and we're here to speculate about them.

So, who's spreading the propaganda that declining fertility rates are due to education and access to birth control?


Someone?
This is a sentence. tHi5 iz a seN+3nce oN drUgs!!!

"When injustice becomes law, resistance becomes duty"--sign seen at Occupy Wall St. protest.

User avatar
ShadowSot
Poster
Posts: 184
Joined: Sat Mar 27, 2010 4:15 pm
Custom Title: Monkey

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby ShadowSot » Mon Oct 04, 2010 11:20 pm

A fellow named Timothy Zell, who later changed his name to Oberon Zell-Ravenheart, would change the horn buds of young goats so that they'd grow into a single horn.
He puts forth the idea that unicorns in medieval artwork tend to more closely resemble goats than horses.
"The nation that makes a great distinction between its scholars and its warriors will have its thinking done by cowards and its fighting done by fools".

– Thucydides

HUMOR

User avatar
vanderpoel
Perpetual Poster
Posts: 4572
Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2009 3:01 am
Location: Honolulu
Contact:

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby vanderpoel » Tue Oct 05, 2010 1:34 am

ruben lopez wrote:
OlegTheBatty wrote:
ruben lopez wrote:It's because of the sexual prowess you get from a ground unicorn horn is why they're extinct and we're here to speculate about them.

So, who's spreading the propaganda that declining fertility rates are due to education and access to birth control?


Someone?

According to the UN Department of Economic and Social Affairs Population Division, the single universal factor effecting fertility rate decline, is mortality decline, regardless of race, religion or political context.
Extrapolated from this sole factor of mortality, there are other universal factors effecting fertility rates, regardless of race, religion or political context:
1. Female age at marriage. The younger the female at first marriage, the higher the rate of fertility and vice versa.
2. Female literacy and education, the higher the female education, the lower the fertility rate.
3. Female mortality rates in childbirth and infant/child mortality. The higher the rates of death in childbirth, and crude infant or child deaths, the higher the crude fertility rate.
4. Female economic participation. The greater the female participation in any form of economic activity or capacity, the lower their fertility.
5. Access to contraception.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fertility_and_intelligence

According to CNN: "The birth rate is falling because of the Great Recession. When people are unsure of their financial future, they tend to postpone having children," Andrew Cherlin, a sociology professor at Johns Hopkins University, told CNN
http://thestir.cafemom.com/pregnancy/10 ... her_reason

Obviously, none of these doomsday scenarios affect the fertility of unicorns:
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
"When you put a toucan on a monkey’s ass, don’t be fooled by the brightly colored plumage, beware of the enormous bill!"

User avatar
Gord
Real Skeptic
Posts: 26662
Joined: Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:44 am
Custom Title: Golden Spiral Trump
Location: Transcona

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Gord » Tue Oct 05, 2010 3:50 am

Durnett wrote:How about unicorns?
-Where did the legend originate?

Medieval travellers. They were always bringing back hugely exaggerated stories. The unicorn could have been entirely made-up; could have been invented in the south to explain imported narwhal horns (which Europeans were familiar with, but the Middle Easterners found amazing); or could have been based on (for instance) the rhinonceros.

-Do the occasional discoveries of goats or deer with only one horn or antler shed any light on this creature? How did the horn get stuck on a horse?

It was stuck on the horse because of stories suggesting the unicorn was "big." Goats aren't big, so they wouldn't do. Just be glad they didn't stick it on a hedgehog.

-Why can they only be approached by virgins?

A medieval befuddlement of Christianity with Romanticism, in which only a virgin woman could attract the symbol that had come to be identified with Christ.

-Are there still believers today? (Other than the Church of the Invisible Pink Unicorn)

Hey, unicorns are real! Just because of everything else I already said, that doesn't mean I don't know they really exist! There's one in my backyard. It sneaks in whenever I'm not looking and eats my carrots.

-Does this unicorn t-shirt threaten my credibility?

Nah. Not the shirt, no.
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

Chachacha
Has More Than 9K Posts
Posts: 9044
Joined: Sun May 28, 2006 1:07 am
Custom Title: Irrational Skeptic

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Chachacha » Tue Oct 05, 2010 3:55 am

Gord wrote:
Durnett wrote: -Does this unicorn t-shirt threaten my credibility?

Nah. Not the shirt, no.


How about the thong with the stragically placed "horn"?

User avatar
Gord
Real Skeptic
Posts: 26662
Joined: Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:44 am
Custom Title: Golden Spiral Trump
Location: Transcona

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Gord » Tue Oct 05, 2010 4:13 am

Chachacha wrote:
Gord wrote:
Durnett wrote: -Does this unicorn t-shirt threaten my credibility?

Nah. Not the shirt, no.


How about the thong with the stragically placed "horn"?

It slightly threatens his credibility as a children's author.
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

User avatar
Major Malfunction
True Skeptic
Posts: 10286
Joined: Wed May 10, 2006 6:20 am
Custom Title: The Hyphenator

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Major Malfunction » Thu Oct 07, 2010 9:13 am

Durnett wrote:Does this unicorn t-shirt threaten my credibility?

Only if it's not one of these unicorn t-shirts. Otherwise, it would just be gay.
This being was produced using the same process as other beings, and therefore, may contain traces of nuts.

User avatar
fromthehills
Has More Than 9K Posts
Posts: 9633
Joined: Wed Aug 19, 2009 2:01 am
Location: Woostone

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby fromthehills » Thu Oct 07, 2010 11:50 am

Chachacha wrote:
Gord wrote:
Durnett wrote: -Does this unicorn t-shirt threaten my credibility?

Nah. Not the shirt, no.


How about the thong with the stragically placed "horn"?


Like this?
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.

User avatar
Major Malfunction
True Skeptic
Posts: 10286
Joined: Wed May 10, 2006 6:20 am
Custom Title: The Hyphenator

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Major Malfunction » Thu Oct 07, 2010 12:15 pm

I wouldn't do well in that culture.

It would take years to grow a new suit.

But perhaps I could open a specialty boutique hut - Mr Big Gourd.
This being was produced using the same process as other beings, and therefore, may contain traces of nuts.

User avatar
OlegTheBatty
Has More Than 9K Posts
Posts: 9779
Joined: Thu Mar 27, 2008 2:35 pm
Custom Title: Uppity Atheist

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby OlegTheBatty » Thu Oct 07, 2010 1:45 pm

Major Malfunction wrote:I wouldn't do well in that culture.

It would take years to grow a new suit.

But perhaps I could open a specialty boutique hut - Mr Big Gourd.


Skin cells are the fastest growing in the body. The epidermis is replaced in under 4 weeks on average, though young people are a little faster, older folks somewhat slower. If it takes you years, just how bloody old are you?
. . . with the satisfied air of a man who thinks he has an idea of his own because he has commented on the idea of another . . . - Alexandre Dumas 'The Count of Monte Cristo"

There is no statement so absurd that it has not been uttered by some philosopher. - Cicero

User avatar
vanderpoel
Perpetual Poster
Posts: 4572
Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2009 3:01 am
Location: Honolulu
Contact:

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby vanderpoel » Thu Oct 07, 2010 5:03 pm

OlegTheBatty wrote:
Major Malfunction wrote:I wouldn't do well in that culture.

It would take years to grow a new suit.

But perhaps I could open a specialty boutique hut - Mr Big Gourd.


Skin cells are the fastest growing in the body. The epidermis is replaced in under 4 weeks on average, though young people are a little faster, older folks somewhat slower. If it takes you years, just how bloody old are you?

Oleg, what about Major's avatar don't you understand?
"When you put a toucan on a monkey’s ass, don’t be fooled by the brightly colored plumage, beware of the enormous bill!"

munsterspeek
New Member
Posts: 18
Joined: Wed Oct 26, 2011 7:05 pm

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby munsterspeek » Wed May 16, 2012 3:32 am

There is a lot of joking around, but actually there is a set of people who have decided the King James translation of the Bible, specifically, is inerrant who therefore absolutely require the Unicorn to be a real animal, as it's in there more than once as a translation from the latin and greek, although it's definitely a poor translation from the Hebrew. Since some of these believers are also creationists who don't believe species or "kinds" go extinct, it's not impossible to find people who are seriously committed to unicorns still wandering around, although it is rare and they are often pretty shy about admitting so.

As a consequence you can still find books around that seriously maintain to offer proof of unicorn sightings and photographs. Evidence does exist people believe in them.

I know this because, at one point years ago, my 10 year old niece who was a firm believer in fairies, mermaids and such when she was 9 announced to me quite firmly that she found out mermaids were not real, but unicorns were, because they were in a book. I was stunned to find that, yes, indeed, there was such a thing.

Aztexan
King of the Limericks
King of the Limericks
Posts: 7539
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2007 10:39 pm

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Aztexan » Wed May 16, 2012 5:35 am

I've seen goats with a unihorn. Do you think those people saw a goat with a unihorn? I bet it was people who saw a goat with a unihorn.

But back to the topic of feces as evidence: the only ancient, fecal evidence that exists as mentioned in the bible is the bible itself.
This is a sentence. tHi5 iz a seN+3nce oN drUgs!!!

"When injustice becomes law, resistance becomes duty"--sign seen at Occupy Wall St. protest.

Face_Palm
BANNED
Posts: 1130
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2012 4:36 pm

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Face_Palm » Wed May 16, 2012 10:50 pm

I think the 'uni-' might be redundant.
:borg: 2.0

User avatar
Gord
Real Skeptic
Posts: 26662
Joined: Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:44 am
Custom Title: Golden Spiral Trump
Location: Transcona

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Gord » Thu May 17, 2012 12:31 pm

munsterspeek wrote:There is a lot of joking around, but actually there is a set of people who have decided the King James translation of the Bible, specifically, is inerrant who therefore absolutely require the Unicorn to be a real animal, as it's in there more than once as a translation from the latin and greek, although it's definitely a poor translation from the Hebrew. Since some of these believers are also creationists who don't believe species or "kinds" go extinct, it's not impossible to find people who are seriously committed to unicorns still wandering around, although it is rare and they are often pretty shy about admitting so.

Yes, but these are the same people who think the non-English versions are poor translations from the original English that Jesus spoke. They think "Aramaic" means "American."
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

munsterspeek
New Member
Posts: 18
Joined: Wed Oct 26, 2011 7:05 pm

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby munsterspeek » Sun Jun 10, 2012 1:28 am

Gord wrote:[
Yes, but these are the same people who think the non-English versions are poor translations from the original English that Jesus spoke. They think "Aramaic" means "American."


I've heard stuff like that before, it's always amazing to me but I shouldn't be surprised. I live in America, and I'm middle aged, so I'm no longer equipped with a good excuse to be surprised when people start talking aurochs.

I knew of one Catholic lady of 80 years who didn't believe that protestants were Christians. No one ever told her. The priests only told her not to enter a protestant church. An anachronism, I supposed at the time. Why she imagined they had crosses on top of those buildings I never found out... she also assumed they had a "different" Bible than she did... very slightly different translation is not what she meant.

Just recently I started hearing how fundamentalists don't categorize Mormons as Christians. While I think their Book of Mormon is, at least to me, a really silly con, I don't see how you get that when the religion has more, not less, Jesus in it.

I think it didn't seem so far out there anymore when during the "language immersion" debate on bilingual education, one sainted lady blurted out something to the effect that the Spanish speaking children of immigrants would be well served to learn to read the New Testament in English, the way Jesus spoke it.

It is no joke...

America is, after all, the promised land, so there are many people touched by the power of the holy here. So to speak.

Once I thought they were few, but now I know, alas, they are many. And that's no Aurochs.

User avatar
Gord
Real Skeptic
Posts: 26662
Joined: Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:44 am
Custom Title: Golden Spiral Trump
Location: Transcona

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Gord » Sun Jun 10, 2012 2:31 am

munsterspeek wrote:Just recently I started hearing how fundamentalists don't categorize Mormons as Christians.

People like Jack Chick (and a lot of Youtube lurkers, apparently) don't categorize Catholics as Christians, either.
"Knowledge grows through infinite timelessness" -- the random fictional Deepak Chopra quote site
"You are also taking my words out of context." -- Justin
"Nullius in verba" -- The Royal Society ["take nobody's word for it"]
#ANDAMOVIE

User avatar
Austin Harper
Perpetual Poster
Posts: 4705
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2011 2:22 pm
Custom Title: Rock Chalk Astrohawk
Location: Detroit
Contact:

Re: Unicorns...with or without rainbow poop

Postby Austin Harper » Sun Jun 10, 2012 7:44 pm

If they're not the same brand of Christian as you, they don't count.
Dum ratio nos ducet, valebimus et multa bene geremus.


Return to “MonsterTalk Suggestions”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest