Tantric sexual healing

A skeptical look at medical practices
il_aspeckt
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Tantric sexual healing

Postby il_aspeckt » Wed Apr 01, 2009 9:20 am

I had an experience with tantric sexual healing recently. I can't explain what happened. It is difficult to talk to friends about this, but I would like others to evaluate it.

My credentials: I'm an arch-skeptic. I work in a field that demands mathematical and technical expertise. I own books by Dawkins and Dennett on religion. I cannot decide whether I'm amused or saddened by the mainstreaming of homeopathy. I'm an atheist and describe myself as a materialist. I respect some people who call themselves spiritual, but in my opinion they bring goodness into their religions rather than vice versa. I do not believe in a soul or spirits.

So, why did I seek the services of a 'tantric sexual healer'? I haven't had a satisfying or lasting sexual relationship in a very long time. And for the last three years or so, if you had offered me chemical castration, I would have taken it. I'm unattractive and obese and see little prospect for a relationship. My sexuality has seemed more like a burden than a gift. Sex was filed in a box marked "despair".

Every once in a long while, I break down and visit a prostitute. (Safe sex only.) There's only so long you can go without seeing someone else naked. But the experience was usually depressing.

Lately I've felt that I could turn my life around. I have been losing weight and making other life adjustments. Over the past week I'd found myself obsessed with sex. But this time, I thought, I should try something different. Something more positive that might ease me back into normal sexual relations. So I saw a listing for someone who advertised tantric sexual healing and decided to try it.

I was greeted by a very striking-looking woman who I would have guessed was in her early twenties. (She's in her mid-thirties.) The apartment was very tastefully decorated and the massage area dimly lit.

The massage session began with us straddling the massage table, semi-clothed, very close and face to face. We talked about what I was looking for and I told her basically what I've written above. Her manner was of unconditional positive regard, lots of deep staring into my eyes. Sometimes it was sort of an act, and other times it was genuine concern as far as I could tell. She embraced me several times like I was an old friend. Gradually building trust. We actually talked for so long we almost used up all the time. Then she had me work on deep breathing exercises, trying to relax into my breaths, and to try to flex my Kegel muscles. (Which she called Kundalini energy. But I mention that mentally, I just translated it to "Kegel muscles").

Eventually we transitioned into the massage, which was very well done by any standard and seemed to last a very long time. The biggest difference was of course how sensual it was, how it paid attention to every part of the body, and that she ended it with manual stimulation of my penis. She took off more of her clothes, likely to help me along with visual stimulation. She seemed to be very attuned to mirroring the sensations she wanted to produce, so she looked at me with what I can only describe as a pre-orgasmic face -- tension, sexual look, an open mouth. At this point my mind started to wander because I actually wasn't quite getting off so I started thinking about favorite pornography. She kept me on the edge of orgasm, continually bringing me close and then backing off. I felt something like electric sparks in my fingertips. I don't remember having any thoughts at all at this point, so I wasn't prepared for what happened next.

When I had the orgasm, I *yelled*. A long low yell, full of deep projection that would have impressed my old singing tutors. It must have reveberated throughout the building. And then I started crying. And laughing. All at once. My hands flew up to my face and I was sobbing uncontrollably.

She immediately embraced me tight and said comforting words. Meanwhile, I was a basket case for minutes. And yet I apologized and said "I'm happy up here (pointing to my head) and the sadness is coming from down here (pointing to the spot just below my belly button.) Even as I said this I realized I was had just pointed to the chakras of Indian philosophy, which greatly surprised me. She said that I had been carrying my pain in that spot, and that the massage had released it, and I had been very brave to be able to face it.

As one sometimes does after a good cry, I felt immeasurably better a few minutes later. But I also knew that my worldview had changed. If I've depicted myself as a sad person, it's partially because I now *know* myself to have been sad and am suddenly unashamed of that. And I had had no idea that an orgasm could achieve this. I've been in relationships before, and I've certainly had many orgasms alone, but I'd never had anything like an emotional breakthrough. After we said our goodbyes and I walked the streets of the city, everything looked different. The downtown of this city can be scary at times but I saw it almost as a hospital ward, with sick people all around me, needing compassion. A kid with a hat with the price tag still attached walked past me and suddenly I saw that not as an annoying manifestation of bling-bling culture, but as a symptom of a deep lack of security and respect that this guy must have experienced growing up. In other words I was temporarily extremely compassionate to everyone. I didn't go home and give away my life savings but I still haven't forgotten what that world looked like that day. It lasted for hours afterwards. Even days later I find that I don't want to eat anything that isn't absolutely pure and fresh.

A few observations.

Yes, I was primed in a way to have a life changing event, so you can argue that I somehow caused it. To some extent that has to be true, because I was open to it. But, I can assure you I didn't expect to what degree it did happen. A few seconds before it happened I was running a favorite pornographic film in my head trying to orgasm.

I've been through many different sorts of talk therapy, looking for answers, but I had never gotten nearly that far even in months and months of therapy. Sexuality as a healing process now seems completely valid to me, although of course not the final answer. (Cognitive-behavioral is something that I think does also work.)

In fact, the idea of avoiding touch in therapy now seems ludicrous. We heal through hugging and compassionate touch. Isn't it obvious? That's the first thing friends do, so why is it that the professional does *less* of it? Shouldn't a professional know how to do *more* of it?

Also, I understood in a flash how these self-styled "sacred prostitutes" see themselves. At least some of their clients must be like me. By the power of being someone else's fantasy, and non-judgmental, they must have seen many personal transformations. I had always wondered how they balanced the contradiction and assumed it was some postmodern claptrap about goddesses and so on, covering up the nasty reality of doing handjobs for cash. But now I see no contradiction -- by creating a world partially made from their client's fantasy, they can guide them all the way through it to some sort of healing. Yes, it's sort of fake and sort of genuine, but so is the concern of your typical therapist. And it's sort of sordid and bestial and sort of divine and ethereal, all at once.

I even found myself appeciating some of their art, depicting bodies as luminous. That really disturbed me because I certainly didn't want to turn into some annoying hippie. But let me just say that I saw what they were going for now.

I can explain a lot of this, but the one thing I can't rationally explain was the extreme physical reaction I had to the orgasm. The theory that fits best was hers; chakras, keeping pain in the body. I still don't believe in that either, but I have no theory that fits as well.

I went looking on the internet for literature about this, and the massage techniques she used seem to be very standard, from the eye gazing to the breath techniques. So there is a sort of reproducible experiment here. They say that at the moment of release, the practitioner has to be ready for anything -- gratitude, anger, screaming, sobbing, anything. I don't know about you but these have not been typical reactions when I have had an orgasm or given one to someone else. So there's definitely something to their practice, something that I can't explain with normal understandings of sex and the mind. It's all well and good to say "well, you were on the edge sexually, of course your mind was in an intense state" but how do you get from there to "spiritual breakthrough"? Even if it is all somehow suggested by the initial expectations the practitioner sets, the process is so transformative it merits serious investigation.

So I'm going to have to say that I don't think science may have all the answers about the mind and the body yet.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:56 pm

You visited, enjoyed, and received the benefits of an extremely talented prostitute, who was so good at her craft that, for you, it manifested as an orgasmic religious experience. Good on ya! Good on her. Whew. "Dear Penthouse Forum, you won't believe the story I'm going to tell you, but I swear every word is true ....." :D

*walks away happily singing "Sexual Healing"*

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby OlegTheBatty » Wed Apr 01, 2009 2:21 pm

Sexistentialism.
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Wed Apr 01, 2009 2:27 pm

OlegTheBatty wrote:Sexistentialism.


W00T!!!! :yahoo: Thank you, Oleg, you have enlightened me! I thought it was just great sex.

Never underestimate the power of touch.

I didn't really understand the appeal of prostitutes until I swam with the dolphins, which was way cool and quite an experience, then I understood the appeal of prostitutes: it feels good, even though you know they're only doing it for the fish.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby il_aspeckt » Wed Apr 01, 2009 2:40 pm

Chachacha: I appreciate your point and it is the sort of thing I was hoping to hear. But please believe my intent wasn't to titillate. It's easy to get all giggly about it because sex is involved, but let me explain more briefly why I thought there was something here for skeptics to discuss.

1) I had a sexual experience lasting that was psychologically transforming. With an apparently long-term outcome. I'm not even sure I would have called it pleasurable. That, in my experience, isn't normal.

These practitioners make the extraordinary claim that sexual experiences manipulate people's "energy", that breath control manipulates a particular "chakra", and a lot of other stuff about masculine and feminine energies pervading the universe and so on. In my experience everything happened more or less as their literature expected it to happen. So these people with some third-hand Indian mythology have a theory, or set of data, with some predictive power, and I don't have any theory at all here.

Unfortunately, it's hard for me to share this subjective experience. It's transformed how I view sex, forever.

People are often happy after sex so this may not seem extraordinary. But I'm an extremely skeptical person and I walked out of there thinking "wow, it's possible that everything I know about psychology is substantially wrong". I mean, so you breathe in a certain way, talk for a few minutes, get a massage, and suddenly you have these stunning personal revelations? That's a pretty surprising outcome.

2) As therapy this seemed more effective than anything I'd experienced, and I've been to a lot of the traditional Western talking cure. I see Western psychotherapy also taking a beating in other threads here, so I wanted to discuss what such an experience might mean in that context.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby bigtim » Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:01 pm

Wow. Your story is awesome. I am very happy for your extremely positive experience and really hope that it does help you realize you're worth it.

I do have some points that would hopefully help your quandary.

First -- ejaculation is not orgasm. Having great sex is a powerfully emotional experience.
Second -- some of what she was doing was actually hypnosis techniques, trance inducing actions. I'm quite sure she believes with every fiber of her being what she says is true. But, the way she acted to you, the things you describe her doing, part of it is putting you in an hypnotic trance, which means your orgasm will be even more potent and all the cool stuff your body can produce will be felt even stronger.

Cha is right -- you experienced the pleasure of an awesomely trained prostitute. That's why they used to have temple prostitutes back in the good ol' days. A highly skilled woman can charge all your wires and make you feel like you never did before.

Realize that this doesn't devalue or demean your experience. It also doesn't mean you can't go see her again :-)
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:04 pm

You had a very powerful sexual experience which was produced a flood of endorphins, hormones, chemicals, etc. I am not trying to diminishing it or dismiss it. I understand the experience, I have been fortunate enough to have experienced it: colors were intensified, the air was balmier, the ocean smells wafting through the open door were an intoxicating perfume, it felt like every pore of my skin was opening to experience the gentle breeze, everything is brighter, everything is better, I don't even like pears, but biting into a ripe, juicy pear was a near-orgasmic experience. That was my experience because I'm a physically-based person, you processed it differently.

Human touch, human interaction which is meant to pleasure, is powerful stuff, and I think you're fortunate to have experienced it in the intensity that you did.

Beats the heck out of doing drugs or religion to get that high, don't it? :wink:

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:12 pm

Wow, I just realized something: some people experience that and they process it as love! :shock:

Wow, that explains a lot!

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby OlegTheBatty » Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:14 pm

il_aspeckt wrote:Chachacha: I appreciate your point and it is the sort of thing I was hoping to hear. But please believe my intent wasn't to titillate. It's easy to get all giggly about it because sex is involved, but let me explain more briefly why I thought there was something here for skeptics to discuss.

1) I had a sexual experience lasting that was psychologically transforming. With an apparently long-term outcomes. I'm not even sure I would have called it pleasurable. That, in my experience, isn't normal.

These practitioners make the extraordinary claim that sexual experiences manipulate people's "energy", that breath control manipulates a particular "chakra", and a lot of other stuff about masculine and feminine energies pervading the universe and so on. In my experience everything happened more or less as their literature expected it to happen. So these people with some third-hand Indian mythology have a theory, or set of data, with some predictive power, and I don't have any theory at all here.

2) As therapy this seemed more effective than anything I'd experienced, and I've been to a lot of the traditional Western talking cure. I see Western psychotherapy taking a beating in other threads here so I wanted to discuss what this experience also suggested.


In fact, the idea of avoiding touch in therapy now seems ludicrous. We heal through hugging and compassionate touch. Isn't it obvious? That's the first thing friends do, so why is it that the professional does *less* of it? Shouldn't a professional know how to do *more* of it?


In the present social climate, mental health professionals who include touching, even hugs, are laying themselves open to charges of professional misconduct, civil suits, possibly criminal charges.

This worked for you, in part, because you knew beforehand that the therapy had a significant sexual component, and you were fine with that.

What would your reaction have been if the sexual component had taken you by surprise? Would this therapy be open to you if you were married? What about your 16yo daughter? Or younger?

I'm glad you found a pathway that might lead you to psychic healing, and I wish you well on your journey.
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby il_aspeckt » Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:24 pm

Bigtim: that's an interesting point about inducing a trance. There's something to that, at least as far as how they get people relaxed. But I've been hypnotized before and the experience seems very different.

Hypnotism makes you not more suggestible but just relaxed enough to respond to suggestions and performance directives with less inhibition.

If there was any 'directive' given here it was extremely subtle. I don't get the sense that she even expected me to have such an extreme reaction. The texts you find on the internet about this kind of massage say the practitioner has to be ready for some deep psychological trauma to potentially be revealed at the moment of orgasm. That doesn't sound like hypnotism to me.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby bigtim » Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:38 pm

il_aspeckt wrote:Bigtim: that's an interesting point about inducing a trance. There's something to that, at least as far as how they get people relaxed. But I've been hypnotized before and the experience seems very different.

Hypnotism makes you not more suggestible but just relaxed enough to respond to suggestions and performance directives with less inhibition.

If there was any 'directive' given here it was extremely subtle. I don't get the sense that she even expected me to have such an extreme reaction. The texts you find on the internet about this kind of massage say the practitioner has to be ready for some deep psychological trauma to potentially be revealed at the moment of orgasm. That doesn't sound like hypnotism to me.


Interesting that you've been hypnotized before. I'm curious what for and which technique. What it means is you're already "primed" and easier to get into a trance. There are quite a number of techniques that can be used to induce different levels of trance. Touch techniques are quite common.

Based on your description I did some 'net searching and saw quite an integration with tantric sex and hypnosis by a lot of practitioners.

I don't think It's that uncommon to have such a powerful emotional experience that 'stuff' is dregged up. Scientology audition is another 'therapy' process that puts the folks undergoing auditing into a trance and the result of that is crap, either real or not, comes to the surface. The fact that this happens isn't really at odds or of concern, it's what you do with it after, or the conclusions you draw from it, that do matter.

From everything you described it appears as if she built a trust bond with you, you were put into an advanced relaxed state, you were slowly, and expertly, brought to the point of orgasm, and you and a mind blowing experience. The emotional discharge had an effect on you.

If you use this as a foundation for studying Indian mysticism the choice is yours. But, being an arch-skeptic, I think a more interesting pursuit would be to study the psychological aspects of what you experienced from the clinical side.

... my 2 cents...
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby brauneyz » Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:15 pm

il said:
Unfortunately, it's hard for me to share this subjective experience. It's transformed how I view sex, forever.

I am definitely not trying to burst your bubble here, but I would be remiss if I did not point out that this event occurred a week (?) ago, and any conclusion above 'forever' scenarios might be premature.

I am very happy that you had a positive experience, but to put it in any greater context than a single data point might be disappointing. Please use it to continue your journey, but not use it as destination. Be well, new friend. Good luck. :D
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby bigtim » Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:39 pm

brauneyz wrote:il said:
Unfortunately, it's hard for me to share this subjective experience. It's transformed how I view sex, forever.

I am definitely not trying to burst your bubble here, but I would be remiss if I did not point out that this event occurred a week (?) ago, and any conclusion above 'forever' scenarios might be premature.

I am very happy that you had a positive experience, but to put it in any greater context than a single data point might be disappointing. Please use it to continue your journey, but not use it as destination. Be well, new friend. Good luck. :D


If I were in your shoes I think I'd need about 300 or 400 data points before I can make any conclusion... depends on how much each session costs though.... just sayin....
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Wed Apr 01, 2009 9:57 pm

il_aspeckt wrote:Chachacha: I appreciate your point and it is the sort of thing I was hoping to hear. But please believe my intent wasn't to titillate. It's easy to get all giggly about it because sex is involved, but let me explain more briefly why I thought there was something here for skeptics to discuss.

1) I had a sexual experience lasting that was psychologically transforming. With an apparently long-term outcome. I'm not even sure I would have called it pleasurable. That, in my experience, isn't normal.

These practitioners make the extraordinary claim that sexual experiences manipulate people's "energy", that breath control manipulates a particular "chakra", and a lot of other stuff about masculine and feminine energies pervading the universe and so on. In my experience everything happened more or less as their literature expected it to happen. So these people with some third-hand Indian mythology have a theory, or set of data, with some predictive power, and I don't have any theory at all here.

Unfortunately, it's hard for me to share this subjective experience. It's transformed how I view sex, forever.

People are often happy after sex so this may not seem extraordinary. But I'm an extremely skeptical person and I walked out of there thinking "wow, it's possible that everything I know about psychology is substantially wrong". I mean, so you breathe in a certain way, talk for a few minutes, get a massage, and suddenly you have these stunning personal revelations? That's a pretty surprising outcome.

2) As therapy this seemed more effective than anything I'd experienced, and I've been to a lot of the traditional Western talking cure. I see Western psychotherapy also taking a beating in other threads here, so I wanted to discuss what such an experience might mean in that context.


I get giggly about things, not just sex, although I do have a particular fondness for sex which does tend to make me giggly. I am blessed (or cursed, depending on one's perspective) with a highly sensitive "funny bone" which predisposes me to seeing the humor in things, but does not mean that the seriousness eludes me.

You express yourself well, and I completely understand what you are saying: you had a profound experience. I appreciate the impact it had on you, and I am happy for you. :)

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby clarsct » Tue Apr 07, 2009 7:59 am

Whatever works.

There are all kinds of ways the mind can freak us out. I've experienced sleep hallucinations that could very well be terrifying if one had no idea what was going on. I was disturbed enough to go research a few things to try to find out. Could be you were in a near-dream state enough to have an effect.

Either way, it seems to be working for you. Some people stare into their navel and chant a lot, others have mind-blowing orgasms. I think I'd take the latter.
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby decreptitate777 » Thu Apr 09, 2009 2:17 am

bigtim wrote:
brauneyz wrote:il said:
Unfortunately, it's hard for me to share this subjective experience. It's transformed how I view sex, forever.

I am definitely not trying to burst your bubble here, but I would be remiss if I did not point out that this event occurred a week (?) ago, and any conclusion above 'forever' scenarios might be premature.

I am very happy that you had a positive experience, but to put it in any greater context than a single data point might be disappointing. Please use it to continue your journey, but not use it as destination. Be well, new friend. Good luck. :D


If I were in your shoes I think I'd need about 300 or 400 data points before I can make any conclusion... depends on how much each session costs though.... just sayin....



Not that I was keeping track or anything ... my n value is in thousands for sure... unclogging the pipes? yes, indeed...maintaining invigorating blood flow throughout the brain and body...no mysterious or questionable results there...

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby vanderpoel » Thu Apr 09, 2009 3:02 am

brauneyz wrote:il said:
Unfortunately, it's hard for me to share this subjective experience. It's transformed how I view sex, forever.

I am definitely not trying to burst your bubble here, but I would be remiss if I did not point out that this event occurred a week (?) ago, and any conclusion above 'forever' scenarios might be premature.

I am very happy that you had a positive experience, but to put it in any greater context than a single data point might be disappointing. Please use it to continue your journey, but not use it as destination. Be well, new friend. Good luck. :D

Unlike brauneyz, I have no trouble bursting your bubble and I would
be remiss if I didnʻt.

So next time try putting your lingam in her yoni and your kundalini will emanate from your root chakra like never before.

But, like brauneyz advices, donʻt use it as a destination,
because, trust me, practice makes pervert. :mrgreen:
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby il_aspeckt » Sun Apr 12, 2009 7:49 am

brauneyz wrote:
I am definitely not trying to burst your bubble here, but I would be remiss if I did not point out that this event occurred a week (?) ago, and any conclusion above 'forever' scenarios might be premature.


I don't think so. One black swan is enough to invalidate the all-swans-are-white rule. One experience like that is enough to change my opinion of what is possible in sex.

For the record, it's been over two weeks now. While the immediacy of the experience has faded, and I've analyzed it quite a lot, the same questions still remain, and have even become more pointed.

It's not like, say, reiki or horoscopes. You have to believe in that for it to work. It's susceptible to confirmation bias, to self-delusion. Whatever this is, it works even if you don't believe in it. I didn't believe in it and I still don't care for chakras or energies or what have you. I've since done a fair amount of research online and in more books. Similar sex rituals seem to have been developed in various cultures, and profound experiences seem to happen on a regular basis, whether the frame of reference is Buddhist, Tantric, Christian (yes, really, look up karezza), or secular.

bigtim wrote:

Interesting that you've been hypnotized before. I'm curious what for and which technique.


An acquaintance of mine did that on me back in college, just with a quiet environment and talking. He just did various parlor tricks like suggesting that I temporarily forget the number 8. It almost worked, but I did one count on my fingers and the "spell" broke. This acquaintance of mine suggested that as a high-IQ sort of person, I analyze things too much to be a good subject.

bigtim wrote:

What it means is you're already "primed" and easier to get into a trance. There are quite a number of techniques that can be used to induce different levels of trance. Touch techniques are quite common.


Now I'm the skeptical one. What is the basis for believing that one mild hypnotic experience fifteen years ago, that didn't even work well, has a lifetime effect?

Anyway, subjectively, my experiences were very different. For me, hypnotism felt like being taken to the point just before you fall asleep, where dreams and confabulation and conscious thoughts all blend together. The tantric experience was more sense-oriented, so my mind was less analytical, but it also felt like being more fully present and awake. Especially the aftermath, which is also unlike the typical sexual experience for a guy; you have much more energy than before the orgasm. The obvious techniques I saw were deep eye contact, mirroring posture, sympathetic breathing, warm and uninhibited hugs, and uncritical positive regard. (Also, partial nudity, but I hope that was obvious.) Kind of like the pop-psych techniques that supposedly establish 'rapport' with a business partner or seduction target but to a much greater degree. This is actually the major part of the session; the massage and the touching of naughty bits comes much later.

So it didn't feel like hypnosis or a trance to me. In any case that seems like a non-explanation. You might as well say it was 'Wakalixes', and you'd have illuminated the subject equally. There's still something to explain.

By the way, lest we forget that is the main topic... I have to admit that as a straight guy, the world does seem a lot cheerier if I'm looking at a woman's naked breasts, particularly if that person seems happy to be with me, is listening, and is sympathetic. Why isn't this the first thing they prescribe if someone has mild depression? Yes, you laugh... but... what would be wrong with this? Are we so terrified of sexuality that we're more willing to take powerful drugs to alter our brain chemistry, rather than try intimacy and a little compassion?

I really feel like a time traveller now, and I'm in the Middle Ages where people are trying to overcome the Black Plague by doing pentitence and hitting themselves on the head.

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Very Happy For You

Postby jag » Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:23 am

Hello il_aspeckt,

Your post was well written and moving. I am almost brought to tears at the joy you found with someone.

OlegTheBatty wrote: In the present social climate, mental health professionals who include touching, even hugs, are laying themselves open to charges of professional misconduct, civil suits, possibly criminal charges.


I start with this quote because, while true, it marks one of the most destructive aspects of religion, control of sex. Without going into detail there, I hold that all of our laws regarding personal and consensual sexual activity are remnants of religious control. If you want to really control people, then control their sex lives. That is one of the major tenants of religion.

And it has, again in my opinion, caused more pain and agony than any and all good that religious organizations have ever engendered. It is for reasons such as this that I have developed what might be called a mild hate for religion.

My body is mine and who the hell are you (anyone) to tell me what I can and cannot do with it!!!!!

I am really happy for you. I hope you can go back and see her often.

While I am not overweight, for various other reasons I am not one of the beautiful people. As a young man my sexual life was rather barren. I will skip the details here, but now I find that orgasms tend to be mind and life altering events. While nothing changes from before to after, during a good orgasm it seems that everything about me and my view of life changes during that moment. But there are times when an orgasm does something to satisfy the body, to some degree, and other times when it is enormously gratifying. The difference between them is enourmous.

Lately I've felt that I could turn my life around. I have been losing weight and making other life adjustments. Over the past week I'd found myself obsessed with sex.


I believe that the condition of often feeling obsessed with sex is the normal condition for males. It is important to be able to turn your attentions to other topics in order to have a full life. But it is normal and completely human to have times where sex is the only thing on your mind. I started writing something that is halfway between a book and an essay about sex that I call “Growing up as a boy, Struggling to be a Man” It is a frank and blatant writing of the sexual perspective of a boy’s progress of sexual awareness. I have about five chapters on it and if you think you might be interested send me a PM.

So I'm going to have to say that I don't think science may have all the answers about the mind and the body yet.


I don’t think so either. Religion is the antithesis of science and wants us to not learn about the mind and body. Science has accumulated a huge amount of information about the mind and body, but has much further to go than it has come. There is so much more to know.

Keep up with your weight loss program. Slowly, very slowly, start to work in gradual exercise. Too little is far better than too much, provided you do something and gradually increase it. Be very careful to not overdo it early, but do engage in ever increasing amounts of exercise. You will know when you have found the level that is best for you. Pesonally, I never ever found the "runner's high" but I have found that I feel much better physically and mentally when I do exercise regularly.

It seems that you found someone that gave you not just a physical orgasm, but engaged you as a person and gave you, albeit for a short time, your first truly emotional sexual experience. Again, I am ecstatic that you found this person and had that experience. Go see her as often as you can. Take care and good luck.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby vanderpoel » Tue Apr 14, 2009 11:31 am

il_aspeckt wrote:By the way, lest we forget that is the main topic... I have to admit that as a straight guy, the world does seem a lot cheerier if I'm looking at a woman's naked breasts, particularly if that person seems happy to be with me, is listening, and is sympathetic. Why isn't this the first thing they prescribe if someone has mild depression? Yes, you laugh... but... what would be wrong with this?

Since you seem to enjoy breasts more when they are naked and attached
to a happy woman, itʻs always persuasive to contribute richly to encourage
your tantric adviser to seem to be listening and to seem very sympathetic.

However, you should realize that looking at naked breasts can also cause
mild depression, especially if youʻre denied access to them or if their
warranty is up.
Are we so terrified of sexuality that we're more willing to take powerful drugs to alter our brain chemistry, rather than try intimacy and a little compassion?

I already mentioned to you that practice makes pervert, so donʻt be like me.
However, Iʻm not terrified of sexuality, but yet quite willing to alter my brain
chemistry instead of trying intimacy and a little compassion.

For the beginning pervert I recommend coke and then work yourself up to
speed. Itʻs cheaper, a hell of a lot more tantric and it will give you the courage
to visit alternative happy tantric places.

But buyer beware, because ice is nice but hard to do and it hurts your immune
system, so I suppose It would be more responsible of me if I recommended
that for a cheerier world, you just stick to weed?
"When you put a toucan on a monkey’s ass, don’t be fooled by the brightly colored plumage, beware of the enormous bill!"

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Tue Apr 14, 2009 12:33 pm

"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." ~ Groucho Marx

Just kidding. There really is nothing like absolutely mind-blowing sex. However, I'm not a big fan of continuing to pay a prostitute for it when you could find the same thing with a woman with whom you could have a relationship to expand on the great sex.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby bigtim » Tue Apr 14, 2009 3:34 pm

Chachacha wrote:"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." ~ Groucho Marx

Just kidding. There really is nothing like absolutely mind-blowing sex. However, I'm not a big fan of continuing to pay a prostitute for it when you could find the same thing with a woman with whom you could have a relationship to expand on the great sex.


While I agree I'm of the camp that if you don't have ready access then budget in regular 'pipe cleaning' sessions. For some guys it's not always easy to find the relationship.
~

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Tue Apr 14, 2009 4:03 pm

bigtim wrote:
Chachacha wrote:"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." ~ Groucho Marx

Just kidding. There really is nothing like absolutely mind-blowing sex. However, I'm not a big fan of continuing to pay a prostitute for it when you could find the same thing with a woman with whom you could have a relationship to expand on the great sex.


While I agree I'm of the camp that if you don't have ready access then budget in regular 'pipe cleaning' sessions. For some guys it's not always easy to find the relationship.


Same is true for all people, but if one chooses to use one's time, energy, and money on a prostitute, one will not have that time, energy, and money to spend on a search for a person who does it for him/her sexually and in other ways.

"Pipe cleanings" are far less costly than "tantric sex", I would imagine.

However, if all one is looking for is mind-blowing sex, (or in il_aspeckt's perception, mind-expanding sex) by all means one should go for it. Get a second job if necessary. Sleep in one's car!!!! Get rid of the dog to avoid vet bills and the cost of food! :D

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby bigtim » Tue Apr 14, 2009 5:40 pm

Chachacha wrote:
bigtim wrote:
Chachacha wrote:"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." ~ Groucho Marx

Just kidding. There really is nothing like absolutely mind-blowing sex. However, I'm not a big fan of continuing to pay a prostitute for it when you could find the same thing with a woman with whom you could have a relationship to expand on the great sex.


While I agree I'm of the camp that if you don't have ready access then budget in regular 'pipe cleaning' sessions. For some guys it's not always easy to find the relationship.


Same is true for all people, but if one chooses to use one's time, energy, and money on a prostitute, one will not have that time, energy, and money to spend on a search for a person who does it for him/her sexually and in other ways.

"Pipe cleanings" are far less costly than "tantric sex", I would imagine.

However, if all one is looking for is mind-blowing sex, (or in il_aspeckt's perception, mind-expanding sex) by all means one should go for it. Get a second job if necessary. Sleep in one's car!!!! Get rid of the dog to avoid vet bills and the cost of food! :D


Well, yeah -- pipe cleaning is generally cheaper than "mind blowing sex". Unless the pipe-cleaner is an expert at it...

As for "same is true for all people" I beg to differ....

Women can always get a man. Quite often she just needs to say yes. She generally doesn't because
a) she doesn't go where men are to find women
b) she has standards....

Men cannot always get a woman. It doesn't really matter if they have standards or not......
~

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby jag » Tue Apr 14, 2009 6:10 pm

bigtim wrote:Women can always get a man. Quite often she just needs to say yes. She generally doesn't because
a) she doesn't go where men are to find women
b) she has standards....

Men cannot always get a woman. It doesn't really matter if they have standards or not......


And therein lies the difference that I feel most women do not really understand. If they find no one up to their standards and they remain without a partner, they have exercised their option. They had a choice. I think they tend to forget that when they look down their noses at men with "lower standards."

Are there any women that visit this forum? I want very much to hear from them.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Tue Apr 14, 2009 6:54 pm

bigtim wrote:Women can always get a man. Quite often she just needs to say yes. She generally doesn't because
a) she doesn't go where men are to find women
b) she has standards....

Men cannot always get a woman. It doesn't really matter if they have standards or not......


But they can always buy one. However, many men have their own "standards" which include not frequenting prostitutes; pretending that a prostitute is something other than a prostitute; using only "high class prostitutes" and not the less attractive "crack-whores" on the street corner, etc., etc., etc.

jag wrote:And therein lies the difference that I feel most women do not really understand. If they find no one up to their standards and they remain without a partner, they have exercised their option. They had a choice. I think they tend to forget that when they look down their noses at men with "lower standards."

Are there any women that visit this forum? I want very much to hear from them.


Ahem. As a woman, (some say "The Woman", but I digress), I can say that women absolutely should know that they are the choosers, and if they choose not to choose from the selection available to them, it is their choice. However, I can also say that, from observation, there are many women who don't recognize that.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby bigtim » Tue Apr 14, 2009 7:47 pm

Chachacha wrote:
bigtim wrote:Women can always get a man. Quite often she just needs to say yes. She generally doesn't because
a) she doesn't go where men are to find women
b) she has standards....

Men cannot always get a woman. It doesn't really matter if they have standards or not......


But they can always buy one. However, many men have their own "standards" which include not frequenting prostitutes; pretending that a prostitute is something other than a prostitute; using only "high class prostitutes" and not the less attractive "crack-whores" on the street corner, etc., etc., etc.


Well... rent one... :-)

And yes, men have standards too. Some refuse to frequent women of "ill repute" for some reason (I know guys like this). And some will frequent them even though they're married to get the things they can't get from their wives (I 'know of' but don't know anyone that does this.... or if they will admit it).


Chachacha wrote:
jag wrote:And therein lies the difference that I feel most women do not really understand. If they find no one up to their standards and they remain without a partner, they have exercised their option. They had a choice. I think they tend to forget that when they look down their noses at men with "lower standards."

Are there any women that visit this forum? I want very much to hear from them.


Ahem. As a woman, (some say "The Woman", but I digress), I can say that women absolutely should know that they are the choosers, and if they choose not to choose from the selection available to them, it is their choice. However, I can also say that, from observation, there are many women who don't recognize that.


I agree that many women do not realize that they are the choosers. In fact, I see plenty of single moms that don't realize that all they need to do is head to any 'geek' event and get their pick of the collection.... Hell they could probably pick them in groups or bunches if they were so inclined....

I think part of is that some women are beaten down so they don't realize their power.

Hell, I know my place. My goal is to kill {!#%@}, bring food home, implant my seed, and die keeping crap out of the cave. My wife is in charge, she always has been, always will be and even though she may ask me what I want or what she should do in reality it's whatever she chooses. I also think that's the natural way things should work. I build the home, my wife not only makes it a home she runs the home. Oh, she'll let me "think" I'm making the decision.... but I know I'm not...
~

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:15 pm

You are a wise man who has a wise woman, Big Tim. (I believe I have said that before. :wink: )
Last edited by Chachacha on Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:46 pm

bigtim wrote:
Chachacha wrote:
bigtim wrote:Women can always get a man. Quite often she just needs to say yes. She generally doesn't because
a) she doesn't go where men are to find women
b) she has standards....

Men cannot always get a woman. It doesn't really matter if they have standards or not......


But they can always buy one. However, many men have their own "standards" which include not frequenting prostitutes; pretending that a prostitute is something other than a prostitute; using only "high class prostitutes" and not the less attractive "crack-whores" on the street corner, etc., etc., etc.


Well... rent one... :-)

And yes, men have standards too. Some refuse to frequent women of "ill repute" for some reason (I know guys like this). And some will frequent them even though they're married to get the things they can't get from their wives (I 'know of' but don't know anyone that does this.... or if they will admit it).


:| <----- This is me withholding comment beyond those which I have already posted on the subject.


Big Tim wrote:
Chachacha wrote:
jag wrote:And therein lies the difference that I feel most women do not really understand. If they find no one up to their standards and they remain without a partner, they have exercised their option. They had a choice. I think they tend to forget that when they look down their noses at men with "lower standards."

Are there any women that visit this forum? I want very much to hear from them.


Ahem. As a woman, (some say "The Woman", but I digress), I can say that women absolutely should know that they are the choosers, and if they choose not to choose from the selection available to them, it is their choice. However, I can also say that, from observation, there are many women who don't recognize that.


I agree that many women do not realize that they are the choosers. In fact, I see plenty of single moms that don't realize that all they need to do is head to any 'geek' event and get their pick of the collection.... Hell they could probably pick them in groups or bunches if they were so inclined....

I think part of it is that some women are beaten down so they don't realize their power.


I'm sure you're right in some instances, but my observations have been that women who are beaten down will take any man they can get, without regard for whether said man/men are worthy of her or not.

And that's right, I said "worthy". I've been doing a lot of thinking about this of late, and in the animal world, males have to prove that they are worthy of a female's attention, and it's as it should be in the human sub-sect of the animal world as well.

But to go back to the discussion of the first group of women: IMO, they're stupid - unless they really don't want a man unless he is their "perfect" man - then it's their right to choose, which includes their right to choose to be alone if Mr. Perfect doesn't appear. What I think we both agree on is that there are women who do not understand that they are choosing to be alone.

Then tying it all - women's choices and men's choices - together in the last chapter (ala Snoopy) .. as well as reversing my earlier decision to not comment: I have very little sympathy, if any, for people who want to pick and choose what they will and will not accept in a person AFTER he/she has chosen him/her. People are package deals and once you've chosen one, you accept him/her as he/she is; embracing and rejoicing in the qualities you love, and accepting the qualities that you don't love. If one finds one has made a choice he/she cannot live with or cannot remain faithful with, one should tell the person; work it out; or make another choice. "I have the right to go to a prostitute because my wife won't let me put it up her butt," or "I have the right to have an affair because my husband doesn't pay attention to me" are not acceptable to me.

Obviously this is not a blanket, be-all-and-end-all statement without exceptions; but it's a cornerstone of what I believe.

And back to the subject of "tantric sexual healing", I know the power of touch, I know humans can "heal"each other through it (or feel as if they have :wink: - which can be the same thing) but, call me old-fashioned, my instincts tell me that the most powerful "tantric sexual healing" occurs between two people who love each other; and becomes more powerful the longer they are together and the more they have stayed together through .... of course, a little practice, and a book doesn't hurt! :wink:

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby brauneyz » Tue Apr 14, 2009 9:13 pm

jag wrote:And therein lies the difference that I feel most women do not really understand. If they find no one up to their standards and they remain without a partner, they have exercised their option. They had a choice. I think they tend to forget that when they look down their noses at men with "lower standards."

Are there any women that visit this forum? I want very much to hear from them.

Well, Jag, as one of the few participating women here, (Cha has already chimed in), I feel compelled to respond, but to what question? Do women have standards? Yes, but then I believe men do too. Do I believe that most women could get laid, nothing more, probably without expending much energy or fear of rejection? Yup.

But the OP, and subsequent conversation, has turned more to mind-blowing sex and intimacy. I am of the mind that the two are intricately linked, but I suppose others will disagree. The OP compared his experiences with run-of-the-mill prostitutes vs. this incredible experience with who someone cares on a deeper level about his well-being. Sure, she's still a prostitute because she accepted money and no doubt will never return if not paid for her services, but she had a vested interest in appealing to the many facets of his being. She intuitively knew she had to reach a deeper layer. That's what he responded too, I think. She held him while he cried. This was a whole lot more than a sexual release. It was acceptance.

Um, what was your question again? :D

For the record, once a woman is of a certain age, her standards no longer include size of wallet or penis. I am an attractive woman, and as long as a man can make me think AND make me laugh, he has at least one foot in the door. Oh yes, he must be clean. One must respect the body or one will never worship at the temple of the brown-eyed goddess. :wink:
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby vanderpoel » Tue Apr 14, 2009 10:07 pm

brauneyz wrote:
jag wrote:And therein lies the difference that I feel most women do not really understand. If they find no one up to their standards and they remain without a partner, they have exercised their option. They had a choice. I think they tend to forget that when they look down their noses at men with "lower standards."

Are there any women that visit this forum? I want very much to hear from them.

Well, Jag, as one of the few participating women here, (Cha has already chimed in), I feel compelled to respond, but to what question? Do women have standards? Yes, but then I believe men do too. Do I believe that most women could get laid, nothing more, probably without expending much energy or fear of rejection? Yup.

But the OP, and subsequent conversation, has turned more to mind-blowing sex and intimacy. I am of the mind that the two are intricately linked, but I suppose others will disagree. The OP compared his experiences with run-of-the-mill prostitutes vs. this incredible experience with who someone cares on a deeper level about his well-being. Sure, she's still a prostitute because she accepted money and no doubt will never return if not paid for her services, but she had a vested interest in appealing to the many facets of his being. She intuitively knew she had to reach a deeper layer. That's what he responded too, I think. She held him while he cried. This was a whole lot more than a sexual release. It was acceptance.

Um, what was your question again? :D

For the record, once a woman is of a certain age, her standards no longer include size of wallet or penis. I am an attractive woman, and as long as a man can make me think AND make me laugh, he has at least one foot in the door. Oh yes, he must be clean. One must respect the body or one will never worship at the temple of the brown-eyed goddess. :wink:

Speaking of foot in the door...
I just took a shower, which made me think...
"How many inches are there in a foot?" :?
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Chachacha » Tue Apr 14, 2009 10:18 pm

vanderpoel wrote: Speaking of foot in the door...
I just took a shower, which made me think...
"How many inches are there in a foot?" :?


Care to share what you were doing in the shower while thinking this?

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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby vanderpoel » Tue Apr 14, 2009 10:20 pm

Chachacha wrote:"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." ~ Groucho Marx

Just kidding. There really is nothing like absolutely mind-blowing sex. However, I'm not a big fan of continuing to pay a prostitute for it when you could find the same thing with a woman with whom you could have a relationship to expand on the great sex.

Cha, there really is no reason to continue to pay a prostitute for
mind-blowing sex. The deal is you pay only once.
But not for sex. You pay for them to go away. :mrgreen:
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby vanderpoel » Tue Apr 14, 2009 10:24 pm

Chachacha wrote:
vanderpoel wrote: Speaking of foot in the door...
I just took a shower, which made me think...
"How many inches are there in a foot?" :?


Care to share what you were doing in the shower while thinking this?

I was thinking: "How does a non-believer worship at a temple?"
And: "Would it hurt my knees?" :oops:
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby brauneyz » Tue Apr 14, 2009 11:01 pm

vanderpoel wrote:
Chachacha wrote:
vanderpoel wrote: Speaking of foot in the door...
I just took a shower, which made me think...
"How many inches are there in a foot?" :?


Care to share what you were doing in the shower while thinking this?

I was thinking: "How does a non-believer worship at a temple?"
And: "Would it hurt my knees?" :oops:

I would make a believer out of you. And I provide pillows. :wink:
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby bigtim » Tue Apr 14, 2009 11:07 pm

Chachacha wrote:I'm sure you're right in some instances, but my observations have been that women who are beaten down will take any man they can get, without regard for whether said man/men are worthy of her or not.


Unfortunately they will take the man that is worst for them....

Chachacha wrote:And that's right, I said "worthy". I've been doing a lot of thinking about this of late, and in the animal world, males have to prove that they are worthy of a female's attention, and it's as it should be in the human sub-sect of the animal world as well.


I agree. I was worthy enough for my wife to choose me. That's because of how awesome I am....

/flex

Actually, I'm pretty damned lucky.

Chachacha wrote:But to go back to the discussion of the first group of women: IMO, they're stupid - unless they really don't want a man unless he is their "perfect" man - then it's their right to choose, which includes their right to choose to be alone if Mr. Perfect doesn't appear. What I think we both agree on is that there are women who do not understand that they are choosing to be alone.


I have a friend who is still single, a great guy, good looking, and laments that he hasn't ever been married or mates. The problem is that the women he goes after all turn him down.... and the women he goes after NOW (he's about 5 years older than me) are pretty much the same women he went after when he was in his 20s....

So, his "standard" means he's not being chosen by women that want a mate.

That means he's going to stay alone even though he hates it...

Chachacha wrote:...I have very little sympathy, if any, for people who want to pick and choose what they will and will not accept in a person AFTER he/she has chosen him/her. People are package deals and once you've chosen one, you accept him/her as he/she is; embracing and rejoicing in the qualities you love, and accepting the qualities that you don't love. If one finds one has made a choice he/she cannot live with or cannot remain faithful with, one should tell the person; work it out; or make another choice. "I have the right to go to a prostitute because my wife won't let me put it up her butt," or "I have the right to have an affair because my husband doesn't pay attention to me" are not acceptable to me.


Yup -- once you give your word by the gods you do everything you can to keep your word. Once you make a commitment to a mate/spouse you are theirs and the worlds of Hel cannot rip that asunder...

Chachacha wrote:And back to the subject of "tantric sexual healing", I know the power of touch, I know humans can "heal"each other through it (or feel as if they have :wink: - which can be the same thing) but, call me old-fashioned, my instincts tell me that the most powerful "tantric sexual healing" occurs between two people who love each other; and becomes more powerful the longer they are together and the more they have stayed together through .... of course, a little practice, and a book doesn't hurt! :wink:


brauneyz wrote:...But the OP, and subsequent conversation, has turned more to mind-blowing sex and intimacy. I am of the mind that the two are intricately linked, but I suppose others will disagree. The OP compared his experiences with run-of-the-mill prostitutes vs. this incredible experience with who someone cares on a deeper level about his well-being. Sure, she's still a prostitute because she accepted money and no doubt will never return if not paid for her services, but she had a vested interest in appealing to the many facets of his being. She intuitively knew she had to reach a deeper layer. That's what he responded too, I think. She held him while he cried. This was a whole lot more than a sexual release. It was acceptance.


Bingo.

My wife told me one time that men are like floors. She said that if you lay them right the first time you can walk on them for years.

You are right in that what is most powerful isn't the act of ejecting your semen into a receptive (and conscious) female. It's the intimacy and bond that is created in the shared experience. That's why a healthy relationship includes sex as well as intimacy.


vanderpoel wrote:..."How many inches are there in a foot?" :?


Well... my foot wears a size 14 shoe.....

I recall these two women approaching me at a mall parking lot. One had a camera. They asked me if I was a virgin. I had an SUV with screaming kids right near me so... being the jerk I am I said "yes". Well, apparently, they go and find men that are virgins that "fit a profile" and film some hot young girl having sex with him. I laughed and said "Sure, let me tell my kids I'll be a bit later, and you'll have to call my wife and ask her permission first.....". The girl got a bit pissed. "You said you were a virgin!" I replied "Lady, I'm next to my Suburban with kids yelling daddy at me ... if you're too dumb to connect the dots it's not my problem...". But once I got home I did some 'net searching and, waddya know, there really is such a beast and apparently I was "picked"... dunno why they'd peg me as a virgin... I definitely look like I've raided my share of nunneries...
~

BigTim

"I'm not entirely convinced that ValHalla isn't real."

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brauneyz
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby brauneyz » Tue Apr 14, 2009 11:16 pm

Tim said:
Bingo.

My wife told me one time that men are like floors. She said that if you lay them right the first time you can walk on them for years.

Tim, have I ever told you I love your wife?
"A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves." ~ Bertrand de Jouvenel

Matthew Ellard
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby Matthew Ellard » Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:06 am

bigtim wrote: I recall these two women approaching me at a mall parking lot. Well, apparently, they go and find men that are virgins that "fit a profile" and film some hot young girl having sex with him. I replied "if you're too dumb to connect the dots it's not my problem...". ..


And where exactly was this mall car park?

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vanderpoel
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby vanderpoel » Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:08 am

brauneyz wrote:Tim said:
Bingo.

My wife told me one time that men are like floors. She said that if you lay them right the first time you can walk on them for years.

Tim, have I ever told you I love your wife?

I laid down the rules and told my wife that I come home if I want and when
I want and that I expect her to have dinner ready when I do come home.

She said OK, but that she expected to have sex at supper time, whether
I was home or not.
I wonder if you love my wife too?
"When you put a toucan on a monkey’s ass, don’t be fooled by the brightly colored plumage, beware of the enormous bill!"

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brauneyz
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Re: Tantric sexual healing

Postby brauneyz » Wed Apr 15, 2009 12:15 am

vanderpoel wrote:
brauneyz wrote:Tim said:
Bingo.

My wife told me one time that men are like floors. She said that if you lay them right the first time you can walk on them for years.

Tim, have I ever told you I love your wife?

I laid down the rules and told my wife that I come home if I want and when
I want and that I expect her to have dinner ready when I do come home.

She said OK, but that she expected to have sex at supper time, whether
I was home or not.
I wonder if you love my wife too?

Not being a real morning person, I vote for sex for supper too!

Alas, I may be cheap, but I am not that easy. Timmy has been sharing juicy tidbits about his wife for some time now. I have established a real connection with her. How dare you promote your wife so casually. (Have her send nekkid pics - then we'll talk, okay? :D )
"A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves." ~ Bertrand de Jouvenel


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